My freshman year of college I hurt my hip in an impact injury. It was November 2009. My trainer thought I had just pulled my hip flexor pretty badly, and it was time for the conference tournament- so I played on for 3 weeks. During the off season I rested and saw doctors at MSU who told me I could have a number of different inflammatory issues but nothing serious. I had an arthrogram MRI, which means an invasive MRI where they inject dye into my joint to make sure nothing is torn. That came out normal. So I was unsure what to do at that point. I went through therapy, got cortisone shots, and nothing seemed to be working.
|My trainer, who was with me through the good, bad, & ugly.|
|Few moments bring feelings like this.|
When I was praying, out of no where I had the idea to go to a church I had never been to. Jake's friend Jen went to a Holy Spirit driven church that I heard her talk about once. And for whatever reason, I knew we had to go there. I called Jake to tell him, and the next day we showed up at the Friday night service in a church we had never been to. While we were there, it was obvious that the Holy Spirit was at work. I was uncomfortable and scared. The kind of scared you get when you know you are going to encounter God. Before service was up, Jen and her friend Amber took Jake and I into the hall so they could pray over my hip. Amber has the gift of healing. Now this was all very new to me, and I still don't know much about it, but I trusted her. She made me laugh and feel comfortable. She explained that not everyone experiences healing in the same way, some people are healed instantly and others have to walk out their healing in faith. I knew God would require the second of me. So after explaining this, they all put their hands on me and prayed. They prayed for healing and that I would have the best soccer season of my life. I cannot explain this feeling I had. I felt a smile rise in me from what felt like the deepest part of my heart. I couldn't help but smile. I started to laugh a little. I didn't feel better in my hip, but it was as if God had His hand right over my heart.
When we left that night, Jake and I weren't exactly sure how my healing was going to play out. However, when I went to pre-season camp I ran the fastest mile and a half time I had ever run in my life. Throughout the season I would play extremely well in games, then afterwards feel pain. It was one of the strangest experiences I have ever had. I would pray before the game and throughout "God, you have spoken Truth into my body, I trust you." And I would be able to perform. When I came off the field I could feel pain, but not on the field. It was as though God was showing me that He was carrying me. It's because He was.
The season went on and I finished really well along with the rest of my team. We made it to NAIA nationals and flew to Alabama to compete. At the end of the season, I received All Conference honors- which I had never received before. It was the best season I have ever had.While this was true, my pain was still there in the off season. I was so confused. I wondered how God could heal me, then "take it away". Had I lost my faith? Was I not being faithful enough? Why was this happening? I went to more doctors, feeling as if I was betraying God's faithfulness because I didn't trust Him to heal me fully.
While I was plagued with so many questions, I realize now that those were not from God. However, in the midst of the storm I was also faced with the question of whether or not I would play my senior year of soccer. The pain affected my ability to play and I was growing more weary. My trainer and I were unsure of whether or not my body would be permanently damaged because of playing through so many years of pain. I went into the summer uncertain if I would be able to play come fall. But the MSU doctors referred me to a doctor in Nashville, Tennessee.
Dr. Byrd was supposed to be the best of the best. I looked him up online knowing he was my last option, most likely for the rest of my life. (I had seen every dr under the sun). When I looked him up, a ton of scholarly articles appeared. He seemed like the Father of Hip Surgery to me. I had no idea how this was going to work out, seeing as every doctor I had seen in the past 3 years still didn't know what was wrong with me. However, I knew I had to give him a chance. I wouldn't be able to see him until after my soccer season, but I wasn't going to give up on the game.
|I've loved this game for 18 years.|
|My family. They were a huge support for me through everything.|
Now this was a very long story and some of you may have missed the miracle in all of it. The miracle is that God DID heal me. Not only did He provide the perfect timing for two surgeries, as well as the financial provision, but the surgeries gave me opportunity to live at home with my family during the precious months before I get married. He completely carried me through my entire soccer/college career, and by doing so healed my heart in SO many ways.
He has proven He is trustworthy and faithful. He has shown me love and grace through His people throughout this entire process. He has solidified in concrete that HIS way is the BEST way, even when it doesn't make sense and feels more like pain than goodness.
God is so good, my friends. This grace covered ragamuffin can't stop talkin about it :) To Him be the glory.
|All For Him|
::By His Grace & For His Glory::